


WAP! in the Pegasus Galaxy

by Sascha (greenet), Tieleen



Category: Stargate Atlantis, WAP!
Genre: Crack, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-01-05
Updated: 2007-01-05
Packaged: 2017-11-08 03:44:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 671
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/438773
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/greenet/pseuds/Sascha, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tieleen/pseuds/Tieleen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Away team WAP end up in jail, because of course they do.</p>
            </blockquote>





	WAP! in the Pegasus Galaxy

"I'd like to say that this is sooo not my fault," Alex announced. He stopped pacing around the cell to point accusingly towards the others.

Izzy arched his eyebrows at him in a very annoying way.

Alex glared.

Rick looked like he was going to say something, possibly "-I- didn't hit on the chief's son" so Alex pointed and glared at him too.

Jana was sitting on the floor and happily munching eucalyptus leaves.

When she ran out, there would probably be more action around here. Alex would feel worse about relying on a koala to save their asses if he didn't know for a fact that some of the other away teams had it even worse.

"Next time, you're not allowed to say anything," Alex told Izzy.

Izzy immidiately looked very suggestive.

"Or do that!" Alex flailed.

"I'll have you know my communication skills have saved my people many times," Izzy said serenely.

"He means shagging," Rick mumbled, giving up on getting the jailors to give him coffee for now.

Izzy glared.

They slowly became aware of some very strange noises outside the cell. Alex turned to look, but Jana was still complacently chewing on the leaves.

He turned back, intending to look outside the barred window, and gave a manly scream.

Rick made a noise of some disdain and dropped him on the ground.

"Oh, my god," said the face in the window. "It's you."

Alex wished for death. Anything had to be better than this.

"I didn't understand why they wouldn't tell me who it was we were rescuing," McKay said. "I thought maybe it was Cadman again. Obviously I should start working on fine tuning my paranoia."

There was a painful noise outside that Alex, now bathed in the glow of enlightment disguised in the form of Dr. Rodney McKay getting his tizzy on, could identify as Ronon making three adult men cry all at the same time. He'd seen it often enough in the training room that he should have spotted it sooner, really.

"Dr. McKay," Izzy said, beaming.

Alex and McKay looked at each other. For the first and hopefully only time in his career on Atlantis, Alex knew their expressions were identical.

"You know what," McKay said, letting go of the bars, "Forget this."

Peering outside, at the ground where he was dusting himself off and walking away, Alex thought he could hear him mutter something along the lines of 'brain the size of planets'.

Several minutes passed. The sounds of battle died down.

At the point when Alex had concluded that the thing he had been waiting for for three years now had finally come -- namely, they'd been left behind on an alien planet, probably with their Atlantis gate codes taken off the system -- the door squeaked open.

"Isobel," Teyla said, frowning in faint disapproval.

"Teyla!" Izzy beamed again. Then he walked over and hugged her before she could step away.

Rick leaned an elbow on Alex's shoulder. "Is this what the earth people mean when they say 'cop a feel'?"

Alex watched Izzy take on a trajectory last seen by latest-tech small missiles. "Oh, yeah."

Teyla turned her frown on them. Marines did not hide, not even from scary aliens, so Alex suffered Rick to suddenly become half in size and disappear behind him. Alex gave her his best nod.

"Leutenant Olsen," Teyla said. "Elizabeth is anxious to hear your mission report."

Alex resisted the urge to bury his head in his hands.

"I didn't do anything," Rick said, sounding pretty damned happy about it, if a little disturbed. Alex wasn't entirely sure he'd actually meant for it to be out loud, which was the only reason that, instead of moving aside and leaving Rick to his fate, he merely took a step back and ground down hard.

"No," Colonel Sheppard said, appearing in the doorway. Rick whimpered a little. "Believe me, we're as surprised as you are. Pack up, people, we're heading home. Here, Jana, we brought you some bava root."


End file.
